Thursday, January 27, 2011

A closed door...

For those that do not know, the door to our adoption of Noel E. closed while we were in Ethiopia last week. While it is sad and difficult to share the details of this occurrence, we find peace in simply saying that God was in the details. The "why" questions don't make sense, and do not bring peace or understanding- only He can do that. He is truly sovereign, and His providence over this cannot be overlooked. We truly rest on His faith, knowing for certain that He has a perfect plan for our lives. We also rest peacefully on the fact that she is also His, and His plan for her is perfect, as well. She is so beautiful. What a blessing it was to have held her, if only for a little while.

We are postured in prayer right now over His revelation of the next door. We are finding comfort in one another, in our family, and in Him as we wait for Him to speak to our hearts. Our agency has been wonderful, walking with us through this darkness. In no way do we hold them responsible, and fully trust their ability to advocate for the orphans in their care.

The thing about closed doors- It is all God. We should never be confused or questioning about the fact that it is God who opens and closes the doors in our life. Revelation 2 shares: "What He opens, no one can shut, and what He shuts, no one can open." Therefore, I am fully convinced. I am required to understand that it is with loving care that He closes doors, and- I am required to thank Him for the closure of those doors. Tough. Stuff. Because you know what comes next- the "why" questions...

God closes doors to get our attention. Sometimes, we are moving along, living life in the way we thought He desired, and we are failing to look at new opportunities or blessings He has for us. All of a sudden- a tightly closed door gets our attention. No matter how hard we try to open the door, we cannot, because He wants us to move forward. The thing is- its scary to move forward. But God promises that it is going to be exciting. And good.

Closed doors are also an incentive to pray more. Do closed doors draw you closer to Him? Yep. They drag you to an undeniable place of desperation and emptiness; a brick wall of helplessness. Suddenly- you are acutely aware of how much that open door meant to you in the first place (maybe you were forgetting that a little while the door was open in the first place). Maybe we find ourselves crying out, "My God, My God, why have You forsaken me?" There is no answer, yet we eventually come to a place where we know we are heard- His peace settles in, and we eagerly await what He is preparing for us beyond the darkness. Oh, but the darkness. It is a lonely, scary place. Painful- Need. More. Prayer. Closed doors grip your heart with the need for force in prayer like you have never known.

Closed doors also prevent us from trusting in man alone. The help of man cannot be sufficient behind a door that God has closed. The promises of man will let you down as you stand before that closed door. No doubt. And here, we feel alone. Yet, someone stands alongside, waiting on you to remember He is there. Many times He knocks at your heart, yet you do not answer, but He waits. Eventually you will answer His knock - He alone holds the key to the next door. Not man. Not you. Only God.

Closed doors make us await God's time. In our own wisdom- our timing is perfect. But God's timing is not always our timing. God closes doors to cause us to wait for HIS perfect timing. He prepares circumstances, he prepares hearts. If we step before His time, we will be unready to experience all He has prepared for us.

God also knows what we need to handle the tasks and blessings He is preparing for us when He opens the next door. The time in the darkness prepares us for the opening of the door. We are being molded and shaped to meet His destiny for us. How thankful we must be that He is preparing us to receive His blessings.

When the door finally opens, we have to proclaim, above our doubts and our fears, that God alone opens and keeps open the doors to our lives. What God opens, no one can shut.

(-derived from everlasting love, closed doors are a blessing.)

So- here we sit behind a closed door. We must pray for God to prepare our hearts for what He has in store for us in the future, proclaiming His greatness in the darkness of the hallway between the doors. God alone is our locksmith.

We so appreciate everyone's prayers and well-wishes for us on this adoption journey. We covet your continued prayers as we seek God's guidance regarding the "next door" in our life's hallway. Above all, we desire to bring glory to Him and live in faithful obedience to His plan for our lives.

Blessings- Kindra


  1. praying for your "now" and your "future."

  2. Oh my, we will hold you in our prayes too! It is so hard when a door closes, even with faith, so we will pray for guidance, understanding and healing of your hearts as you wait for the light to shine through the next door and the Lords hands leading you to that door.

  3. Thank you for sharing - and praying that God continues to draw you close to Him through this tough time.

  4. PRAYING!!!! As one who has faced closed doors too.....PRAYING as God holds you, comforts you, gives you guidance, and know that we are lifting you up to HIM.

  5. Will be praying for ya'll as you seek God's will for the next chapter of your life!

  6. Just wanted you to know that we think of and pray for you often. Before we began our adoption journey, we visited with the head minister at our church. He prayed for us, and I will never forget how he asked God to open the doors for us that led to where we needed to go, and to close the ones where we were not supposed to go. Blessings to you as you wait behind the closed door. God is faithful.

  7. I am so sorry. I cannot imagine how hard this is for you. I pray for you to have hope in what is to come.