Thursday, October 28, 2010

This is your child...follow me.

We have had such a whirlwind of a week! We have been through so many emotions and stages of grief and joy... In so many ways this experience has been so humbling and requires such a deep faith and trust in the Father. I was sitting in class at the beginning of the week attempting to concentrate through my emotions, anxiety, fears, excitedness, and longing. I turned to look at the wall to my right, and Luke 9:23 was staring at me, "Take up thy cross and follow Me." Yet, somehow, I read "This is your child, follow Me." Although I had not known it before that moment, it was the first time I accepted, Noel E. as my daughter. God ordained her into our lives. He chose US to be her parents. The reality was overwhelming. Over the week before, I had been grieving her life, her relinquishment, the heart of her birth mother, the time that I have/am missing with her, and through that grief I had somehow missed accepting that this child was given to us from our loving God. She is exactly what He designed for our family. So, we move into a painful wait...

We have completed our referral packet, sent it in, and have had our "next steps" phone call. Now, we wait. Seriously, we wait again. But now the wait has a face, a heart, needs, desire for her forever family, pain, longing...and so much more. We just want to hold her! We want to look in those big brown eyes! We want her to know that she has a family!

So next...our court date. We are praying boldly for our court case to be opened very quickly, and for travel to be just as quick! Please, pray with us to bring Noel E. home.

Blessings- Kindra

Saturday, October 23, 2010

A Baby Girl!!!

It is hard to believe that we actually heard the words, "I have a little girl that I want to talk to you about." God certainly rocked our world this week!

We thought all along a little guy would be joining our home. From the beginning, the discrepancies in the boy and girl list had been so wide that we just didn't think a girl was possible. (With God, all things are possible!) All the waiting and delays- all part of His story for our lives, her story as our daughter.

It was almost time for school fall intensives, and Brandon and I had been praying that we could just get the call before I left. Being 9 hours away from one another after waiting more than a year for "the call" was not an idea that we wanted to entertain! Monday came and call. Tuesday, I had agreed to work, but like a bad employee left my cell phone in my scrub pocket "just in case"! The staff and physicians all knew if "Baby Love" started singing from my pocket to expect screaming!

After lunch, I had a baby on the scale when my normal "Mizzou Fightsong" ringtone started sounding. (Go Tigers!) I silenced it and apologized to the mom I was with, thinking nothing of it. I finished my assessment and checked my messages when I was done. IT WAS "B", saying "Kindra, if you have a minute, can you give me a call. I have something I need to discuss with you." AHHH! What! But there was no "Baby Love"! As it turns out, "K" was sick that day, and "B" was calling for her.

I ran, shaking (trembling, really) into the back offices. My friend of 11+ years, Jill, saw the look on my face and started screaming. I redialed the phone, praying that "B" would answer, and she did. Then the famous words..."I have a little GIRL I want to talk to you about." DID YOU SAY GIRL? Jill heard "girl" before it really set in and started screaming and jumping up and down again, alerting my pediatrician (with whom I have worked the past 11+ years) that something was up behind that closed door! She saw the smiles on both of our faces and joined the fun...

Brandon was 5 hours away at one of our facilities, in a board meeting none the less. I had not even asked "B" how old she was, knowing that Bran would want to hear all the details. I called his cell- no answer. I texted- nothing. I finally resigned to call the facility and telling them to get him out of the meeting, NOW. When he answered, I said, "Your a daddy today! It's a GIRL!" He was so excited, and totally did not believe me. "But we were number 1 on the boy list", he said. Then..."Babe, I have to finish this board meeting before we can take the rest of the call. I am in the middle of my presentation." WHAT!? Ok, I have been waiting the past 13 months for this day. Letting you finish your board meeting will be ok. I will live. Work- probably not going to be very productive, but I will try!

Brandon and I heard about our daughter for the first time Tuesday afternoon, October 19, 2010. She is about 5 months old and is so beautiful. Her story is hers to tell, but Bran and I will be forever grateful that God gave us the opportunity to be a part of it. Since he was out of town, we waited almost 6 more hours to open that email to see her beautiful face. Talk about patience! I couldn't wait to open that email, but we had agreed to do it together, no matter what! In the mean time, we had a great time calling our family and close friends. We hadn't even seen her face for the first time, but we knew without a doubt that this was the child that God had chosen for our family, and she is.

The next days were filled with International pediatrician reviews, paperwork, and stars swirling around my head, I am sure. Now, we wait. We are praying for a court date in the next couple months. It will be the longest time of our lives. We cannot wait to hold her in our arms.

Sorry that we cannot share pictures with you. They cannot be posted until she is legally ours and we are home with her. If you see me in person, I would love to share!

Please continue to pray for our daughter, her health and happiness. Pray for her Ethiopian mama. Pray for the special mothers loving her at Hannah's Hope tonight. Pray for the hearts of this mommy and daddy who ache with a need for her to be with us.

We are overjoyed, baby girl. There are so many people waiting for you to come home. Don't be scared. Feel the breeze on your cheeks- it brings sweet kisses from your mommy and daddy.

"You have granted him the desire of his heart and have not withheld the request of his lips." Psalm 21:2

Blessings- Kindra
Mama to Baby E, 5 mos @ HH

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

High upon the mountain...and on top of the list!

WOW! We are unofficially number 1 for a baby boy and number 2 for a baby girl. Rejoicing on this mountain God has placed us on today!

We are going to see your face anyday, little one! We are going to be mommy and daddy to the child God hand-picked for OUR family!

I want to build a house up on this mountain!

Lift your hands up and Praise the Lord! Psalm 134:2

Blessings- Kindra

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

October Baby Update

It is hard to believe that we are into our official wait 9 months already, and still have not seen our babies face(s). We continue to meditate on and trust in God's perfect timing, but each day gets harder and harder in our humanness. We love you Baby York. You and your mommy rest deep in our hearts.

3- Boy

4- Girl

7- Siblings

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

Blessings- Kindra